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Monthly Update (required)
i can honestly say that the first week of applying the Healing Olive to head and heart was a very good week for positive mental shift here, the weeks leading up to it arriving (on the day after January’s full moon) my mind having got quite clouded, aware of having fallen back into slumber from a big awakening experience the months prior to then. In these seven days it was restored to much better clarity again – this reflected also in the physical world in happening to get new prescription glasses on day 4! – mentally, in seeing that my descent back to the lower consciousness 3D matrix realm again appeared to be from getting stuck on new personal beliefs of what life after enlightenment should entail whereas my original seeming arrival in the higher dimensions had been from letting go of ALL beliefs. While still a long way from feeling the ‘awake’ and ‘enlightened’ that for a time i felt i was, or in such ‘heavenly’ dimensions as witnessed then, i have still been maintaining a pretty good sense of peace and calm these further three weeks of Healing Olive. Back to meditating each morning (prior to applying the Olive) and starting to write about those spiritual experiences had in the latter months of last year so these aren’t completely forgotten. Whilst gone back to smoking some cannabis again after a period off any addictions, i am mindful of having returned to this habit, trying to use it creatively and not abuse it, and looking into a change of scene where wouldn’t feel need it at all doing some international volunteering. Thank you to you Shlomo & to the Healing Olive if this has indeed been playing a part in helping here.
OK, two months into using the Healing Olive already (bottle’s contents gone down a lot in this time, seems to be only maybe one month’s more left remaining), i find my mind in a calm place, glad to see the start of the spring here and more friends and family again as coming out of the hibernation have been in over the winter. Have done some more creative writing to try and fully remember and make sense of my multi dimensional shiftings of the late summer and early autumn of last year (be these of a spiritual experience or schizophrenic episode), and am re reading the book ‘The Unfoldment’ by Neil Kramer that appeared to help instigate this back then, as well as two new ones, Sam Harris’s ‘Waking Up’ and Trish and Rob MacGregor’s ‘The 7 Secrets of Synchronicity’ that all seem to be helping to reactivate the sense of magick that managed to tap into and access during those few months experience. Also hoping to get a last minute place on another silent Vipassana meditation retreat starting in the next few days for another period of more focused and disciplined self inquiry. There has been sad news also of two more friends passed on too young this year, one of these who i would see in my life most days, but am hoping these are now roaming in peace in bigger dimensions, such as i glimpsed!, beyond this earthly 3D matrix. While of the belief that we are spirit having a human experience, i have nevertheless been reminded once more of the fragility and uncertainty of this human life, appreciating the good things of this more and the loved ones of it for so long as continuing to get to spend time with them here. Plan is to find better use of my time helping fellow humanity and / or animals after Vipassana, if not back to editing videos towards the global awakening, then some volunteer work locally or internationally. Thanks again Shlomo inviting me to be part of this Healing Olive project, has been good adding Healing Olive to my morning ritual – first meditation, then applying this, helping keep check of where my mind has been at. Peace.
Wow, Healing Olive has done what it said on the tin, so much gratitude. Such a different transformed me and world, thanking this, and Shlomo, your kind gift of, for its help in completing the shift started into the new reality. That one month ago when planning to go on Vipassana retreat i failed to get place on this, and instead fell ill with fever, using the illness to do a home retreat instead of intensive meditation from sick bed, spiritual reading and videos watching (Mooji, Alan Watts, Barry Long and others) and starting new YouTube channel One Mind Awakening with video edits of more such speakers. Awakening in the dream again. Some iboga micodosing in the weeks afterwards, whilst also continuing to apply the Healing Olive each day, has helped me to deprogramme my false dream character (defined by false beliefs) to find a better true One underneath. In doing this i have been seeing this good Oneness in all reflecting back, especially in one particular lady have connected with online and in phone chats, Viola. She having some housing troubles in north of the country, and between work (working in mental health field) i have invited her to Brighton as vegan-vegan, human-human, spirit-spirit friend. She seems onboard with my craziness and search for truth and to be true (and someone i have been open and honest with all the way since starting talking with) so trusting the dream, my dream character and hers and see how we get along in person and what she wants to do from there. Going with the its all a dream and we all are One. From my point of view it will be cool to have a new vegan and spiritually minded friend who is up for spending some time with me to show vegan Brighton to and other cool things. A chance to practice and maintain this new better version of me. Just getting this third update for here written before going to the coach station to meet her, she arriving exactly two months to the day when writing my first update here and three since starting the Healing Olive 🙂 Peace, love and olive from a healed B.
Fourth month of Healing Olive already, now very near end of bottle, last bits not so easy to reach with dropper. Has been interesting fast changing months, accelerating an unfolding started five months before this, and this last month with new female company in this used to being a loner’s life. Funny observation that her name Viola a near anagram of Olive. Finding myself in a new timeline to be sharing my home with anyone this long, only short term lodgers (more often, male) having crashed the sofa over the nearly twenty years been living in this place, and no lasting relationships with any women in this time. Though me and Viola are not a romantic item, enjoying time spent together and experiencing daily magic and miracles. Do i will for more? Thought i might do but no. Some time ago i asked the universe for a female soulmate – then went on to project this on to a new woman met online and then a longer time known good friend (not for the first time falling for her), neither of these being it. Looking back at my remembered life i have run into spiritual roadblocks when ever longing for anything or any one, so now am practicing just being, and enjoying being good soul mates. This soul friend here hosting in the front room until she finds job and money to afford own place in Brighton. Happy to share my space and all i have til then, and in helping her the universe has been helping me and us both, providing for. This a relationship of compassionate rather than passionate, unconditional rather than wanting, expecting or needing anything love. Enjoying living in the moment rather than in past memories or thinking too much about the future. Appearing in many ways to be like a couple at times, however not. Of course with getting on so well i’ve entertained, and voiced, ideas of getting together as such, but that not what she wanting so respecting that, and deep down also thinking myself that for the best. Both dreamers, but with different dreams. Hers more earthly, wishing to work and to bring children into the world, whilst mine about transcending the matrix of birth, sickness, ageing, death once and for all. All good and well as it is in the Now. Learning, unlearning journey continuing. Thanks again Shlomo and Healing Olive.
Watch for the 27th of September for “…transcending the matrix of birth, sickness, ageing, death once and for all”
So it’s now five months since starting with the Healing Olive, last two of these having female friend only met at the beginning of these last two months staying in my home. A good platonic friendship built over this time – happy to be helping her out until she gets sorted with work and money for own place that she is actively looking for. Very tiny last drops in the bottle of Healing Olive have still been applying each day whilst i have completed a two months course in iboga microdosing in conjunction with. Finished fifth and probably final video for my One Mind Awakening YouTube channel over these past weeks also, and have largely stayed awake to being in the dream that awoke in, though still things like war plus human and animal suffering apparently ongoing in this dream. In personal world another friend dead too young – fourth gone this year, but as my teacher plants guide reminded me, its selfish to be sorry for those gone on ahead, and of course really there’s no such thing as death. In finite bodies but all infinite energy / consciousness. Where do i find my ‘self’ personally living my apparent existence in this realm? In a peaceful state, living more in the moment than memory the brief slippings out of this Now can recall. Woken up to it being a dream feels kind of like journeys end – with this also the realisation that i can’t wake anyone else up – all the videos i’ve felt needed to edit in trying to (and to fully wake myself up) are finished and online now, my human life this time round’s work feeling like done. No earthly wants or desires, or need / wish to do anything more – at peace with whatever is as the remaining however long of perceiving self to be in this finite character plays out. The iboga has helped here, and maybe the Healing Olive also, in supplementing years of Vipassana meditation’s taught self observation mastery over mind to exist without attachment or aversion – much faster catching myself if such should arise (illusory thoughts or feelings). Happy in helping others of the dream what i can while here but ultimately ready for the beyond earthly human experience whenever that may be. An old soul been round man times in this earthly matrix i feel. So choosing to enjoy this last of the earthly ride and do best to help others enjoy theirs. With love. May all beings awaken and be liberated.
Six months of Healing Olive later and the bottle now empty, it’s interesting to look back over this half a measured year – two of these months having had new friend in life and home, who has now moved on to other place with a live in job. This was a good and interesting experience for me, an opportunity to help another of the One unconditionally, and nice to have a bit of company for this time, friends working out better than the more than that i’d been open to, had we clicked that way and she been open to that also, when first inviting her to stay. Glad now to have place back to just this one self however, now that she is all sorted, as realised my character is better suited to solitude long term. Back to the meditation and over this last week three final microdoses of iboga plant medicine, one of these in floatation tank. This offered another dissolution into the Oneness again. Then on a bigger dose at home i envisaged a white light – instead of going to this light, this light came to me and filled my perceived physical body with its glowing essence. Lost my ‘self’ again like have been doing a lot over these past months and the five months before that. Ever more maintaining the awareness that I Am the witness, not the perceived self most often referring to or being referred to as ‘B’. Yet to continue operating on this physical plane having to keep returning to ‘some’ self / ego, the challenge not to get lost too identifying with it or stuck in this. This perceived i got robbed a few weeks ago, money taken from cash point whilst in a disorientated altered state returning from an allnight beach party. Lost spiritual calm then and this ‘i’ reacted – getting angry at whoever took this money and myself for having got so out of it to let it happen (my iboga guide suggested this was the iboga kicking my ass for not being more present – alcohol here in the mix). When i calmed down however in accepting the situation as it was the bank ended up refunding the stolen sum. More instances this past month also have been showing me the same – to stay present and mindful, not get caught up in any of the drama – to observe whatever may be going on but not react. This reacting self my old pre healed me, not the me i awoke to. Now I Am the detached mindfull observer again. Thus alcohol and recreational drugs i am giving a wide berth and greatly reducing my cannabis use also in view to stop. Whether will succeed with this or not remains unknown as i still find it enhances my character’s life in this dream, and helps with the writing and video editing, but making the effort to remain more mindful and awake either way. Thankful to Healing Olive, and these monthly reports, also in helping towards that. Peace and gratitude. Finding this self in a better balanced mind than was six months ago.
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